Revised
Marriage expenses cause headache these days
Isra Aziz 2k18/MC/65
Expanded
Article
Parents grow
up their children in a good environment. Their first priority is to educate
them and feed them a healthy food. But, when the time of their marriage comes,
they get scared because of the norms, set by the society. These so called norms
are marriage ceremonies should be held in a huge banquet with number of food
items, well decorated bride and
bridegroom's entry that makes no sense to me and each and every function must
be organize in a separate hall, that can cost above 50 lac.
The dowry
system where second family from the boy's side demands uncountable things like
furniture, gold jewelry and many more, they do not even think that opposite
family can afford these things or not. They just want what they demand. Some of
the family members from girl's side, they want a boy for their girl with good
looks plus handsome salary.
The bride
and groom’s wedding outfits that are of no use after wearing once, are some
other burdens ranging from thousands to lac. Furthermore, other family dresses
and presents increase this burden and make it unbearable sometimes.
On 5th March
of 2019, I was invited to attend a wedding ceremony of one of my relative's
family friends in Karachi. I went there and what was the most interesting thing
for me is that a girl who was going to get married was a daughter of a
Government employee in health department and being the only person who can earn
for his family his father arranged her daughter's event in a very huge hall
well decorated with so many flowers and astonishing lightning which was making
the environment more beautiful and attractive. Thousands of people were
enjoying out there and all of sudden one thing happened that spoiled my mood
completely and not only mine but it also converted guest's enthusiastic
emotions into sadness, grief and kind of awkward because that one thing was a
demand from boy's family they said, "if you people (means girls family)
can't give a car to our boy then we will not let our boy to marry your
girl". I mean what kind of demand it was like humanity has been killed by
us. To organize a wedding in such an increasing inflation situation is not an
easy task for anyone and such people pour more burden on those people who can't
even live their lives properly.
While living
in a country named as " Islamic Republic of Pakistan " we must keep
this Hadith in our mind "The most blessed Nikkah (wedding) is the one with
least expenses." quoted words of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).
But the
question is who made these marriage expenses big and then bigger? Of course, the
people, live in this society, are responsible for fulfilling these demands just
because they have a fear of not to speak up. They just try to make the marriage
ceremony happen in any way. Even some people take loans just to show off to the
society.
Can't we be real and simple? If we make
ourselves simple and real, then things will go easier for all of us. We should
try to make weddings as simple as we can. This is how we can end the fear of
not being able to afford the expenses among people.
To control
such rising expenses, the Punjab Marriage Function Act was passed by the Punjab
Assembly on 14 of April in 2016 and approved on 19 April 2016 by the Governor
of Punjab. The act is known as "one dish rule" which defines that the
organizer of the wedding can serve only one dish that means one salan, one rice
dish, salad, cold drinks and one sweet dish. Isn't it better than 60 plus
dishes that usually goes wasted by the people? This law is being followed in
Punjab for many years, ending the misery of people living out there somehow.
Also, Khyber
Pakhtunkhwa Assembly harmoniously choose to follow up the KPK bill. It is same as
the Punjab Marriage Function Law but in this bill there is one different thing.
According to the bill, bridegroom's family cannot force the bride's family for
dowry. If they do so, they will be inflicteda penalty with regard to 30 lac or
captivity of maximum 2 months. Well, that's a good initiative, taken by the KPK
Government which should be enforced in Sindh too.
And here i
would like to appreciate the efforts of some the NGO's like Hidaya foundation
which has been serving the poor and needy in economically depressed areas of
Pakistan, India , Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Indonesia and West Africa since 1999. Their mission is to support
countless families in South Asian
countries which are unable to have their
sisters and daughters get married. Till
now this foundation has supported 3,363 marriages under marriage support
project. If anyone wants to give their contribution to this foundation they can
donate through online submission by using check or credit card. This foundation
is playing an important in a society and performing its job very well.
Instead of wasting
money on lavish weddings, we can save this money for a needy person who
actually need our help. For this, we all have to change our mindset and
attitude towards marriage arrangements and expenses. This will make the society
more beautiful for living a life to the fullest than it can be.
To conclude
my subject of discussion i would like to add a quote of Sir Albert Einstein as
well “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking it cannot be
changed without changing our thinking." So we must work on modernizing our
thinking.
==============================================================
Ok
Marriage expenses cause headache
these days
Isra Aziz
2k18/MC/65
Nowadays, the psyche of people is judging you on how much
money you're going to spend on your child's marriage and it became a hype and
trend to do a wedding at large amount of money. A wedding which includes
unlimited customs and traditions and functions like bridal shower, nikkah day ,
mayun, mehndi, dholki night, wedding day and valima ceremony is declared as
memorable by the people. The society made marriage-a Shariyat act, difficult
for itself. While in Islam, those weddings that are simple are more successful.
Parents grow up their children in a good environment. Their
first priority is to educate them and feed them a healthy food. But, when the
time of their marriage comes, they get scared because of the norms, set by the
society. These so called norms are marriage ceremonies should be held in a huge
banquet with number of food items, well decorated bride and bridegroom's entry that makes no
sense to me and each and every function must be organize in a separate hall,
that can cost above 50 lac.
The dowry system where second family from the boy's side
demands uncountable things like furniture, gold jewelry and many more, they do
not even think that opposite family can afford these things or not. They just
want what they demand. Some of the family members from girl's side, they want a
boy for their girl with good looks plus handsome salary.
The bride and groom’s wedding outfits that are of no use
after wearing once, are some other burdens ranging from thousands to lac.
Furthermore, other family dresses and presents increase this burden and make it
unbearable sometimes.
But the question is who made these marriage expenses big and
then bigger? Of course, the people, live in this society, are responsible for
fulfiling these demands just because they have a fear of not to speak up. They
just try to make the marriage ceremony happen in any way. Even some people take
loans just to show off to the society.
Can't we be real and
simple? If we make ourselves simple and real, then things will go easier for
all of us. We should try to make weddings as simple as we can. This is how we
can end the fear of not being able to afford the expenses among people.
To control such rising expenses, the Punjab Marriage
Function Act was passed by the Punjab Assembly on 14 of April in 2016 and
approved on 19 April 2016 by the Governor of Punjab. The act is known as
"one dish rule" which defines that the organizer of the wedding can
serve only one dish that means one salan, one rice dish, salad, cold drinks and
one sweet dish. Isn't it better than 60 plus dishes that usually goes wasted by
the people? This law is being followed in Punjab for many years, ending the
misery of people living out there somehow.
Also, Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Assembly harmoniously choose to
follow up the KPK bill. It is same as the Punjab Marriage Function Law but in
this bill there is one different thing. According to the bill, bridegroom's
family cannot force the bride's family for dowry. If they do so, they will be
inflicted a penalty with regard to 30 lac or captivity of maximum 2 months. Well,
that's a good initiative, taken by the KPK Government which should be enforced
in Sindh too.
Instead of wasting money on lavish weddings, we can save
this money for a needy person who actually wants our help. For this, we all
have to change our mindset and attitude towards marriage arrangements and
expenses. This will make the society more beautiful for living a life to the
fullest than it can be.
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